Heavy Is The Crown

by Hungry Lights

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Keres Snow
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Keres Snow Absolutely stunning followup to The Awry Ascent. I can easily say that I can't wait for the coming releases by Hungry Lights. I cannot stress enough how inspiring this is. Favorite track: The Thorn That Split My Wheel.
C.G.G.
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C.G.G. Another solid album from the ongoing 5-part series that is From Windfall to Hell by Justin Bonitz. Favorite track: Constancy.
Daniel Svensson
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Daniel Svensson Yet another well made album and once again I decided to give you a little extra as payment to thank you for making this amazing music that I listen to for hours every day.
I thought I'd get bored of listening to They Awry Ascent non stop for months but nope, I didn't. But now I have The Awry Ascent, Heavy Is The Crown, Call it Egos Back To The Old Ways AND Mt. Garbage to listen to non stop. Haven't bought Snailfetus Kidney Sacrifice's album yet though, but I will, soon enogh.:P
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about

"Heavy Is The Crown" is a concept album about a man's dismal attempt at redemption after having failed to fulfill his endeavor from the previous album,. "Heavy Is The Crown" is part two of a five part series called, "From Windfall To Hell," which is the tragic tale of a man's delusional descent into madness.

If you click on the individual tracks here, you will be greeted with a small chapter summary of each song—describing what is literally going on within the lyrics.
For a more detailed summary, you can visit the Hungry Lights Wiki:
hungry-lights.wikia.com/wiki/Heavy_Is_The_Crown

credits

released November 15, 2016

All songs composed, written, recorded, mixed, and mastered by Justin Bonitz. Album art by Justin Bonitz.

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all rights reserved

about

Hungry Lights

Hungry Lights is my solo music project. The plan is to release five concept albums all surrounding a character named, "Prill," who is a plesiosaur hunter on a quest to better his life, but everything he does just adds to his own delusion and lack of self-worth. The music is the musical interpretation of a book series I have been writing called, "From Windfall To Hell." ... more

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Track Name: Aphotic Currents 2
Instrumental.
Track Name: Contempt
I was damned to repeat it
Temerity leaking and left behind
Miles out in the burning sea
-Where my virtue stayed afloat
My summer came, I let it slip
And now regret tugged at my coat

In spite of the seed I chose to grow
When you smiled,
I'd reconcile with all disdain my body showed
And with pretentious, tired eyes...
I would look into the sea,
And long a crown that never fit

I would not admit defeat
Had it gone differently, I could have been a king!
Now contrition curled my skin
Does it amuse you to watch a fool like me
Walk down a fishing line
Stretched 'cross a crater of sulfur and failure?

Alive, but never I'd felt so dead!
That beast, she groaned inside my head to be set free
Ripping flesh from bone,
Her watchful eyes had been exposed

Salvation was unknown to me
While I was trapped in that wolf skin
This mind, o' it was already forsaken!
And I breathed out flames and lies and lies
Let me demonstrate the lack of faith I'd obtained

True self, like a diamond,
Was hiding and covered in soot
Underneath mirrored mountains,
You squirmed and you shook
Such life should never be contained!
So you claw and you bite and you scream

I was made to show the world how much a failure
Could grow and learn from his mistakes
Instead of rotting in their wake
All the glory—all the fame could never bring me consolation
Forever feed this fire that calmly vampires and erodes itself
-To only bring contempt
Track Name: Wickerman
O’ I had just simmered and fumed!
My heyday was trimmed and was pruned
T'was soiled with the mulch of remorse
I replayed this hundreds of times in my head
And I searched for a fault or a blunder or curse to blame
-No such miscue occurred
It was my cross to bear,
And I walked with that cross on my back

My bridle and patience wore off
I'd not sink in and wait for a door
I had to get out!
-Had to flee from the scrawl in my head!

All these starving flames inching onto me
Can’t be stomped out now
And you'd never let go
We’re hanging from the edge,
Swaying riotous
While candles burn away at my straw, wicker hands
O’ the fall’s so far down!

From the brim of my hell, I had glimpsed an escape
So I played a few hands, and I learned a few tricks
And from ‘cross the bridge, such glowering facets turned
It seemed luck's key had found its hole
And with such merry comes great sorrow
On and on those candles burned...

This windfall would never wear off!
With a verve, I made way toward the floor!
Fate threw me the dice,
And I staked such a price—that I did!
One more game—one more chance to reclaim my crown!

All these starving flames inching onto me
Can’t be stomped out now
And you'd never let go
We’re hanging from the edge,
Swaying riotous
While candles burn away at my straw, wicker hands
O’ the fall’s so far down!

Then a darkness veiled the scene,
And spelled me to walk the flames
To roll and wonder—always wondering!

If time rewound itself, I'd kick myself to leave
This was defeat
Before I even hit the ground, I knew that I was smoke
A fuse made of greed had fastened into me
And it had stitched up my retreat
And I had been given one chance
Bet you'll never see me again as I burn it all away
I had betrayed me!

I didn't know if I should fight or run or beg for mercy
I knew for sure that all my common sense had turned to ash
Across from me, a dozen eyes reflected malcontent
So I stood up tall to point and aim the gun between his eyes
I couldn't figure what I felt inside
-It buzzed and pressured
Like being stabbed in the gut
And in the heat I cried,
"Get on your knees and beg me not to kill you and your family
Down on your knees,
You pray to God that I don't change my mind!”

‘Cause inside, there's a gun that's loaded
And that gun's always itching to be fired
I had my finger on it—I had my finger on it
To pull the trigger
-Problem solved and walk out pure as wine
Had I learned to bite the bullet...
Had I known my place in line...
I had my finger on it—I had my finger on it
And then I pulled it
I was charred enough to change my mind
Track Name: The Thorn That Split My Wheel
O' how my actions turned me to a snarling beast!
The very essence of what I had left behind
-Back in the churning ocean
The thorn that split my wheel was gnawing at my heel-side
When did I learn to wield those fangs?

I lost my mind, back in the sea
And the wondering still frustrates me
Of all the pawns my wrath could reap,
It was one that hid forbidden shackles
They twisted in and coiled up my arm
Until they reached my rib-cage
My heart displayed a quickset bolt
-A lock for one who chose to compliment my rage

An albatross is soaring high
-The one I had admired from before
Before my kettle boiled over
To envy it’s not weighed down by my guilt
Easier to forgive than it is to forget
But my fate had come from a brother who's in ire
Will my revered burn as I walk the coals?
Where had I gone wrong?
For you had paid for my misstep

I walk a path I cannot see
How the wandering does frustrate me!
Revenge was sought and full of holes
I know it so, for I had felt that emptiness
And you were gone, and so my tears…
They fell so sweet
O' even autumn was pushed aside!
Was I the snake that ate its own tail?
A hungry light that did not think before it struck the fruit

Could I find you?
For in that corner, I chose to turn away
You couldn't stand me
The man that you had loved has died
I’ve gone away
O’ even if you called for me, I wouldn't change!
I need a reason for peace in my mind

Alone, I would trace it all backwards
If a hand is tied, I’ll grow two more!
How the loss of what glimmered
Can help a lowly man back to height!
My awry ascent of delusion,
I had dismissed it as a nightmare
I am not settled in the crotales,
For I’m not tuned for that score

Cut in between the lines of who I was and am now
My hands were soaked in blood
My hands are soaked in blood
-The ink to draw the map to lead me back to your side
And there was nothing in the universe to keep me from you
Lie, lie, lie, lie, lie

So I approached it with caution
Watch my hands for the cue,
And I'll show you that I can't ever miss!
I reminisce of a time I didn't half-walk on a thread so fine
So connect the dots for me—one at a time
Until this picture's clear
‘Cause I'm unsure if I can find where I lay in the design

Cut in between the lines of who I was and am now
My hands were soaked in blood
My hands are soaked in blood
-The ink to draw the map to lead me back to your side
And there was nothing in the universe to keep me from you
Track Name: My Finest Hour
With much plight, I rose to full height
Matching a hero!
-The atramentous sky beating down
And I was too proud to admit
That all I had gained was a mess of dilemmas
And I would not call this an encore
T'was a brand new stage!

Throw your pigeons a pie!
This is my finest hour!
Though you saw my return,
You didn't see I'm no coward

On my side, I noticed a dial
No numbers or indication for sleight of my hand
The way had been sealed from the inside
The outside was weathered—much like myself
So I poked and prodded its nature for the story it'd tell

Throw your pigeons a pie!
This is my finest hour!
Though you saw my return,
You didn't see I'm no coward
With a heart opened wide,
And a soul turning outward
There was nothing to change
Not in my finest hour

And I reckon I'm cured
So I sound out a hearty hallelujah!
For the world looks much more perfect
Through less sensitive eyes

I read this on a paper that could represent my life
At first I deemed it hostile,
For I only saw in one dimension
It's overwhelming just to think I was so blind
The answers I've been searching for are already here!
If I'd just look around!
Open the coffins I pretend are eyelids and stare!
They're already here,
And I saw past it all in disbelief

Then my soul felt light as a feather
And your waves had ushered my return
That saline air I breathed brought memories of your shore
So I poked and prodded your nature
For the story you'd been trying to tell me
It was written in stardust, but I was too prideful to see!

Throw your pigeons a pie!
This is my finest hour!
Though you saw my return,
You didn't see I'm no coward
With a heart opened wide,
And a soul turning outward
There was nothing to change
Not in my finest hour
Not in my finest hour
This is my finest hour
Track Name: Piñata
A wasp buzzed with the beat of a drum that no one could hear
I was in dream when it pattered across my window of trance
The waves heaved out a lumbered breath
The eager sun stung my eyes
The dream appeared as a riddle,
For the soul cannot speak in words
Your temptation found the stone
When my perception was in the gray
So I poked onerous at that dial
That was lodged so deep inside my pith

I did not ask to have this dream
And with all the bloodshed, I'd one way to repent
And when all the hellions opposing me
Have kicked the flames,
You’ll be back here with me

To the heights, another foul nest—no branches
I denied all I felt inside as they brought me down
I was good ‘til your devilish stone kept prying
To not invite the poison bite as they danced behind my eyes

You threw your stone right into my chest
And truth be told, I had not bled for this
The vespiary inside was breached
And here come the wasps to pique those in their way!

To the heights, another foul nest—no branches
I denied all I felt inside as they brought me down
I was good ‘til your devilish stone kept prying
To not invite the poison bite as they danced behind my eyes

And who am I not to set them free?
When if I don’t, they’ll eat away my insides
I might have kept the nest, but you threw your stone
So it’s not my fault
No, it’s not my fault!

And who am I not to set them free?
When if I don’t, they’ll eat away my insides
And who are you to act so pristine?
Like you don’t have some soot of your own
Well, Mrs. Humble,
I’m sorry I don’t shine
I’m a little scratched up from the mistakes of my life
O’ Mrs. Humble,
I’m sorry I don’t shine!
I’m a little scuffed up from the mistakes I’ve made
-But at least I lived my life
Bet you’ll come around

O’ I feel like I’m ruined!
Their sting has seen to it
And who’s watching?
Who’s watching?
In mirrors—reflections

The swarm inside’s rewrote my way
And I don't think I can be saved
Too caught within their wicked horde,
And we’ll never change
So we sin and are sent down where I found my crown
We sin and we sin and we sin and we sin

Ever careful, you lead me to the edge
-A drop so endless, there’s no room to misstep
And you told me,
“I hope you brought your wings”
A push so gentle, I barely seemed to notice the fall
Did I trust you...
-Touched by Heaven’s dirty fingers
Track Name: Demetrius
O' it was fool's gold!
As I approached, distilled—swimming in dither
Had I gone astray?
Was it from longing for the crest I’d obtained?
I wouldn’t feel the chains

I was lost again
The bridge from here to you was burned,
And I was stuck in between two cliffs
-One behind and one in front
I sank down until a hold from up above
I felt a pressing weight from my new crown,
But I could never ever take it off

I was trapped under all the nonsense upon my height
How there was no fortune after all!
Just a boa constricting and pressing in

I've tried my hardest to fight against her revolt,
But she had stonewalled
O’ she’s the prospect I’d never hold!
And a reflection from the out
Distracting from the realm within me
I knew not friend nor foe,
For everything I saw was filmed in wrong

I was dreaming
Ladada-ladada-ladadum
I was dreaming
Ladada-ladadaaa!

When I awoke, the world I knew had been retired
It dropped down
I dropped again!
And I regret pursuing the foul beast,
For I had let arrogance contort my perspective
I’m in ire!
And what a waste to think I had it perfect!
No, what did I have?
What did I have?
Nothing!
I am sincere when I say
That I wish that I never went back to the sea
-Deeper, the pit of my failures

In my eyes, you’re a clockwork soot-bat
Rearranged by perception
Do you feel it, or do you just want to leave me?

Well, aren’t I just the black-sheep jackal
Kicked from salvation's den!
How do I know you don’t trust me?
Because you tricked me...
Is to trust not to put all faith into someone you don’t know?
Well, I don’t know you
At least I don’t anymore
Track Name: Heavy Is The Crown
To your eyes, I might seem half alive
But to me, fiction swirled and wrote my story
-Possibly told allegory
In hindsight, I should have stepped light
But it's too late
Deception had no meaning—the mask was torn
I charged, for I'm no coward!
But I suppose I failed
I tried to take this hour!
But I suppose I failed

There's only so much amends can change
Before boiling over
And all that I'd gained meant nothing to me
For I was left field
Wanting to rid me of her haunting
And nothing real could stop me!
But the faster I'd run,
The tighter the fangs of the crest took hold

Wide-eyed and turned around
A stone pound in the chest—denied and downed
But I still wore my crown
When all odds are stacked against me
And all courage split,
I’ll stand my ground with a prideful prowess
-Heavy is the crown

I thought that I was bleeding virtue
Bakarum, bakarum
But all I ever did was hurt you
Bakarum, bakarum
And as she plays her heart before me,
Put to sleep by her song
I promised never to desert you…
Bakarum, bakarum!
Still lying to myself
Come join my treasured collection of tales
Beneath the onus upon my height,
Was there a sliver of the man I used to be?

Wide-eyed and turned around
A stone pound in the chest—denied and downed
But I still wore my crown
When all odds are stacked against me
And all courage split,
I’ll stand my ground with a prideful prowess

Heavy, the sucker’s crown
Track Name: Constancy
Fate decides this time I spend alone
And I know it’s not forever
So I keep to myself—my own little imperfection
Would I try to write my own way
Or trace the lines between the dots?

O' I wish I could forget everything!
To dig up all the seeds I had sown,
All the dreams I had chased...
How I wanted to make this right!
But their buzzing dampened the way
The swarm was too loud
And was drowning the sound of my soul's shrieks

How I just want to go back
And remove myself from others’ lives!
Blow up the bridge—a bomb between you and me
Another could take my place!
I want to be a nobody
I want to disappear

Your word's only good when it's not make-believe
It's harder to reclaim a trust once it leaves
And harder to do so from behind the walls of a prison cell
But your arrow met its mark down the center
Splintered, fractured,
And dust was all that matched what you shot
From the quiver of your scorn
-Such bolts don't belong here

How I just want to go back
And remove myself from others’ lives!
Blow up the bridge—a bomb between you and me
Another could take my place!
I want to be a nobody
I want to disappear

O' they took my lamb away!
And the wolf I was, how I howled resurgence!
And this chastened snare of pride and steel was a part of me
How I'd bite my own head off!

I was burning
I was weakened
What I felt’s below dismay
To inherit such stigma and peel back that shell
I don’t belong here

No one cried, "timber" when I fell
My roots were worn and dried
So I just fell...
I just fell apart

Were you ever even with me?
Did you ever even care?
-Another victim for the coward’s rage
If I went to the beginning,
And I traced it back to here,
Would I understand my flaws?

And what am I to do with this limiting, fail-safe rationale?
And who was I to prove?
Being the conqueror,
I had vanquished all the petty, little thorns on the sidewalk
-Kept the concrete clear
And so time increased its pacing
Now too fast—I’ve grown afraid!
And what am I to do with my fear?
And how do I prevent these burning tears from falling out?
If I run from the truth, I’m only hiding from myself
But that reflection in the mirror,
That’s not the person I should see
Track Name: The Worst Of Evils
O’ how faceless!
How pitiful I’ve become
A soft impersonation of who I am
I’m outnumbered and made to fold
Now an offed and spent reflection has stained the glass

I once dreamed of a bittersweet end
And I’m done correcting most flaws
‘Cause who am I to ever be anything?
I’ve blown through the pages,
And no hope for perfect sight
I’m in denial

But I'm not a coward!
For when I had it all,
I had the courage to let things go...
Yet in the final hour,
I was not good enough
I'd not the strength to push things through

You'd find me face down—alone
The blinding glimmer of the king's crown
Should never have tainted this mind
I'd rather fail than lie again!

But I'm not a coward!
For when I had it all,
I had the courage to let things go...
Yet in the final hour,
I was not good enough
I'd not the strength to push things through

O' I stood with a fist full of anger!
I lashed out and clawed at the door
Your cage could no longer contain me,
For I was feeling that weight lift off
That's me in the front of the chamber!
That’s me who I saw in the glass!
Your cage could no longer contain me!
I was free...
Now to keep that promise I'd made
Windfall called me
To slay any wicked things that stand in my way
Hoping I'd find you in slumber soon
Track Name: A Father's End
In the darkness, there's a glow
And I suppose that's the idea
So to the ground, stealth and swiftly I proposed
-On the chance no one could hear me
Warry footsteps in the gray
But I’m not frightened
I would fear me!
And all this time, I'd never sank so low
That’s why I feel so far away

I'd one shot and all to lose
(My eyes were shut, my ears were set)
-No such thing as wasting time
(Not a patient man, so a penitent man)

My hands were coarse
And my heart beat with a sound
Like a stampede of horses
I’d no idea what was waiting there for me
That’s why I feel so far away

I'd one shot and all to lose
(My eyes were shut, my ears were set)
-No such thing as wasting time
(Not a patient man, so a penitent man)
Patience—my only move
(My eyes were shut, my ears were set)
And that slipped when I fell away
(Not a patient man, so a penitent man)

My god, I’m not okay!
Looking out in confusion, I had made a mistake!
I had jumped to conclusion
And there was no escape

-Not my best
I had sacrificed everything
I would not leave this place empty-handed again!
There was no retreat
I’d not be defeated by virtue
Believe, I’d push it

What a heathen to make an impression on me!
Introducing: the star of the show!
Dirty fingers and laughing
Your eyes could not lie
I held my back to a fiery stove

I was in ire—I was engulfed
All I desired?
-A slit of the throat
I was outnumbered—all of me burned
I would rip off this crown if I could,
But it branded itself to my skull
Felt cemented, my spirit was choked
The flames rushed in
I smiled—I smiled for you!

I'm impressed that I could not see it through this maze
Different stage, but the mask was the same

I felt numb
That fel-crown slipped off
My soul went quiet for the first and only time

What have you done for me?
This trust’s been lost
I am tired, and I am done
I don’t care anymore!
-Dreams of fire seared my cheeks
But I couldn’t feel anymore...
Has my heart turned into dust?
-No more tears anymore
Here’s to a father’s end!