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Fate Won't Pull Me Under

from Mudoo Ra by Hungry Lights

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about

In this chapter, Prill is simply reflecting and searching for purpose. Now that he has achieved both fame and fortune, he does not really know what to do with himself. He feels too ugly to go home, and since he has finally had a taste of victory, he wants to keep going. He cannot settle for the win. He feels like he is destined for something even more glorious, more spiritual, like he was chosen by the gods themselves.

lyrics

All my life I’d been the underdog—a solid second best
Here’s to my decay, and here’s to moving onward!
You’d placed the stakes so high
-A gambling connoisseur
The crowd, it cut like daggers soaked in poison
Blathered fame into my ears
But their words can’t ever undo change,
And people hate with all their hearts
What they can’t seem to control,
So I’d rather face the depths of that old spear
Than let them ever know me

No way I’m dying
Fate won’t pull me underwater,
And I can’t help but wonder,
Am I just done?
The story marches on
I don’t think I wrote my best
Fate won’t pull me underwater

Those bellowing voices all were deafening
I couldn’t help, my hands were tied
Something’s boiling—raging
-Something’s multiplied
How do you take the vital step
When you’re shoulder-deep in failure?
I don’t want to believe,
But I can’t help it
I already read between the lines!
And now I know
Every passing second paints a masterpiece
I’m splattered on the canvas in gold,
And I bet from far away
All the mistakes just give it more emotion

So I feel I’m done resisting
I’m not scared of what’s below
I could show you everything I’ve grown to loathe

No way I’m dying
Fate won’t pull me underwater,
I can’t help but wonder,
Am I just done?
The story marches on
I don’t think I wrote my best
Fate won’t pull me underwater

You expressed a burden
Suddenly you’re holding onto naught
But every minute I succeed,
Two points from death!
The regret don’t keep me,
‘Cause no purpose halts for flesh and bones
And all of that nonsense

Only once in my life did I ever think I could be so misread
But it came, and then it went so fast
-Another smudge to the back of my head
If I ever went back in time,
I wouldn’t even try to fix these mistakes
-If I even want to call them mistakes
But if I ever went back,
I’d sit and watch myself evolve into the person standing there
He’s become the opposite of what you wanted
-Though indebted
He owe’ too many people too many favors
-Too many things to worry about,
But he ain’t worried about that—nah
He don’t remember
Would things change if he could?
Would they change if he planned out ahead?
Would things change if he kept his cool?
I’ll keep on thinking all the reasons that I’m breathing,
That I’m believing,
Is ‘cause out there someone else is still in need of me
Look at me deciding,
Providing that there is more to life than getting riches,
Acceptance, and peace of mind
Despite tears,
I infect you, and there is no counteractant
You’re defective
There’s a message that I think is worth protecting

No way I’m dying
Fate won’t pull me under
There’s too much to wonder,
And I know we’ve only just begun
So I guess I should try my best to write something more

No way I’m dying
Fate won’t pull me under
There’s too much to wonder,
And I know we’ve only just begun
So I guess I should try my best to write something more true

credits

from Mudoo Ra, released April 1, 2019

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Hungry Lights

Hungry Lights is my solo music project. The plan is to release five concept albums all surrounding a character named, "Prill," who is a plesiosaur hunter on a quest to better his life, but everything he does just adds to his own delusion and lack of self-worth. The music is the musical interpretation of a book series I have been writing called, "From Windfall To Hell." ... more

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